57 THINGS TO DO WHEN TWITTER IS DOWN

You’ve worked hard to get that task done and are hungry for a little reward. You open your browser and select Twitter from your favorites. The page opens…and your heart sinks. Twitter is down. Great! Now what are you going to do? Head back to the to-do list? Not a chance! You’ve got to unwind for 20 minutes or you’ll go crazy! Relax. Don’t worry. Take a deep breath. I’ve got you covered…

57 Ways to Unwind WITHOUT Twitter

  1. Take a bike ride.
  2. Feed a pigeon.
  3. Watch this video cover of “We Are Young by a guy who makes all his music with his mouth.
  4. Eat a Kind bar.
  5. Ask someone in the office, “If you could have any superpower, what would it be?”
  6. Walk to a public place where you can find someone reading and strike up a conversation with them about the book.
  7. Read this article containing 72 statistics on digital media.
  8. Get some office coffee, cup your hand over it and sniff, then slurp as if you’re doing a professional cupping.
  9. Walk into a shop down the street and ask what year it is. When the clerk tells you, run out of the store screaming, “It worked! It worked!”
  10. Start a Hangout on Google+.
  11. Fill out a permission slip for yourself.
  12. Chew a piece of gum and see if you can stretch it from end of your office/cubicle to the other.
  13. Push the Red Button.
  14. Watch Marcus Sheridan’s Story.
  15. Create some recipes in IFTTT.
  16. Using your webcam, create a video of yourself attempting a cart-wheel.
  17. Write someone a “thank you” note.
  18. Call a friend that you haven’t spoken to in at least 3 months.
  19. Watch this music video about a guy trying to impress his dad.
  20. Read the most recent post from each category on 12most.com.
  21. Add your favorite book to this list and vote for your favorites that are already there.
  22. Watch a guy blend an IPad.
  23. Watch this trailer and try not to cry.
  24. Go to the break room, open the fridge, take pictures of everyone’s lunch, and put it on Pinterest.
  25. Buy a “Hello, My Name Is…” nametag, write the name of your favorite superhero on it, and wear it the rest of the day.
  26. Play this video, stand up, and try to mimic the way they’re dancing.
  27. Stalk your kids on Facebook. (If you’re really feeling cruel, you can post a baby picture on their wall).
  28. Research one of the following topics on Wikipedia: jugglingRussian literatureelectrical engineeringThe New England BlizzardAlcoaBoer GoatsSeth RogenPaper ClipsCare BearsTwitter.
  29. Check the best pee times for your favorite movie.
  30. Watch this parody of “You Oughta Know.”
  31. Watch a random movie clip.
  32. Read Seth Godin’s Blog.
  33. Buy something random on eBay.
  34. Buy one of the following books on Amazon.comDifficult ConversationsContent RulesPoke the BoxThe Speed of TrustOnwardTrust-Based SellingIn the PlexThe Story Factor. Send it to someone who could use it.
  35. Google your name.
  36. Think about what you would call a memoir about your life and put the title in the comments below, post it as a Facebook status, or share it on Google+.
  37. Learn a nice speaking tip from Chris Westfall.
  38. Watch this innovative video about a new model of advertising.
  39. Learn how to launch a self-hosted WordPress blog.
  40. Walk around your office humming the Darth Vader theme song.
  41. Go to Starbucks and order a quad venti half-caf, 3 pump sugar-free caramel, 3 pump white mocha, extra caramel sauce, extra foam, with cinnamon powder white mocha…with a splenda and a sugar in the raw on the side. Oh, and one of those little green stopper thingies. (Leave a BIG tip).
  42. Find someone on a bench reading a newspaper, snatch it out of their hands, and run away. Return it and tell them that you just wanted to see how they would react.
  43. Watch Angela Maier’s Ted Talk.
  44. Run around your building three times. Check your pulse. Multiply this number by seventeen. This is your lucky number.
  45. Watch The Mean Kitty Song.
  46. Get some edgy perspectives.
  47. Join Toastmasters International.
  48. See the most expensive business card in the world.
  49. Prank call someone in your office.
  50. Watch Margie Clayman show off her new hat.
  51. Write down a sentence and think of all the possible meanings it can have by emphasizing a different word each time you say it. Example? MY dog ate my homework. My DOG ate my homework. My dog ATE my homework. My dog ate MY homework. My dog ate my HOMEWORK.
  52. Make a collage out of all the promotional literature about your company that you can find.
  53. Watch this video about  a surprise at a tech conference.
  54. Write down as many words as you can with the letters from the word
    floccinaucinihilipilification.
  55. Send a text to a random number that says, “Okay, I’ve got the body. Now, what do you want me to do with it?”
  56. Learn how to date your customers. (Courtesy of Yours Truly).
  57. Make your own list of things to do when Twitter is down.

Okay, Twitter’s probably back up now. But, then again, you’ve wasted enough time already. GET BACK TO WORK!

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